The Junior Lawyer
By Ray Alan T. Drilon
Junior Lawyer talking to a group of friends: “Gentlemen, I’m giving free food and unlimited rounds drinks, I feel generous.”
Friend: ” To what do we owe this generosity, if you don’t mind my asking?”
Junior Lawyer: “I won the largest law suit in our town so far. My fees alone practically ruined the defendant.”
Friend: “This calls for a toast.”
(After the toast.)
Old senior Lawyer to the Junior Lawyer: “Young man, I’m impressed. If you could whisper to me how much was your take in your case, I promise under pain of ostracism, to keep it in the strictest confidence, and will never divulge the exact amount of your fortune.”
Junior Lawyer beaming with pride:” Well sir, since you are the most senior and the oldest among us, in this great company of Attorneys, I will oblige, on your promise, to keep it in your safest confidence.”
(Junior Lawyer whispers to the ear of the old lawyer, whose eyes widen with expression.)
Friend: “Since the secret is out, but kept in the strictest confidence, may our senior lawyer please indulge us, if you could give us, at least, a graphic description, of course not the exact monetary figure, of the extent of our colleague’s professional fees?”
Senior Lawyer to Junior Lawyer: “Would you, sir, permit me only to describe it?”
Junior Lawyer: Yes sir, you may, an adequate description would suffice.
Senior Lawyer speaking to the group with pompous ceremony:
“Gentlemen, in my lifetime in the practice of law, I have not earned even a fraction of what our friend here had earned in his single case. Our young Attorney is a class apart from the older generation of lawyers where I belong. You see this young fellow is unlike any other lawyer. He is like the Vikings of old. When they invade a village, they completely take everything, living and non-living things, including the old women. That, my friends, more or less, sums up my description.